It’s good to be 8, but hard to be 28

My nephew is spending the night here for the last time while I’m here. :(  We had a good day though. Went to the bouncy castle place, went shopping for swim trunks, ate McDonalds and he swam in the lake for an hour. And he got to play with our neighbor’s great-grandkids, one of whom is his best friend. It’s good to be 8. Tomorrow we’re having lunch with my mom at her office and then hitting up Costco.

He’s such a good kid. I’m really going to miss him. We talked about me leaving and he’s sad. Says he won’t see me very much. Makes me so sad. I love him so much, but I have to go. I have to focus on my life now but I can’t help but feel guilty. I’m his only aunt and I’m basically helping my parents around the house full-time. I’m going to miss him, my parents and my cat. And throw in a few friends, but that’s about it. I won’t miss the rain, the lack of motivation in this city, or the snobby legal community.

This will always be home but it’s time for me to go make a new home for myself, if that makes sense. I tend to be pessimistic about life changes, and I’m trying really hard not to be. I keep thinking of what I’m leaving behind instead of thinking about what is ahead. And that’s not a good attitude. I know that I’m supposed to leave. I know I’m supposed to be doing this. There is so much potential in MC. New friends, a job (hopefully),  new boys, a new place to live, new experiences, etc, etc. And throw in the beach There’s not much here but the family and a few friends, and resentment at my life not going in the direction I want it to go. And there’s no job here. And there’s a whole world out there that I want to experience. I just don’t want to get to my new apartment and be stuck mentally here. I’ve grown so comfortable here and I’m in a rut. And I know I need to get out, but it also scares me. Argh. I know I’m repeating myself here over and over again.

Off to eat some blue corn tortilla chips and try to think about all the great things in MC.

And did I mention the boy from Vegas has been texting me? In my last text I wrote, “Keep in touch”, and he wrote back, “You know I will ) That’s good right!?

Hot hot hot

I am so hot. Its like 90 degrees. And it’s not fun. It’s not dry heat and it’s not humid, but it is still  uncomfortable. I guess I should get used to this as I’m moving to MC. Yep, I found a place! This girl I had been in contact with a few weeks ago re-contacted me this week and we worked out the details. My cousin checked it out and said it looked cool. It’s a good area, has gated parking and a pool. And it’s a small unit and everyone hangs out, so I’m excited for that. Now I just have to get down there. Most likely my brother and I will drive down in a couple weeks. I am nervous and kinda freaked out, but I’ll blog about that later. Too hot right now.

I saw “Definitely, Maybe” last night. It was pretty cute.  Didn’t really make me hate my singleness so that’s good.

Friday night I had some drinks with my friend P. He’s married and totally not my type, but I think I’m his. Sometimes he’s a bit “pervy” and comes across as he’s interested in me, but I just ignore him when he acts like that. He’s told my friend J that if he wasn’t married he’d be all over me.  I try not to hang out with him one on one for that very reason, but Friday it just happened to work out like that. Luckily it went ok and I made sure to talk about the kid from Vegas. Who texted me Friday night and then didn’t write back after I wrote him back. Kids are so fickle!

I kissed a…

So I have a guilty pleasure. I really like that song “I Kissed a Girl” by Katy Perry. It has a really good beat. But I really don’t think kissing girls (if you are a girl) is right. I think the tone of the song is right in that she’s not in love with the girl and it’s just an experiment, but I have a lot of friends that see nothing wrong with girls kissing girls. And these are the same friends that think it’s wrong for guys to kiss other guys. Double standard? I think so. I feel bad for listening to the song, but I really like it! But I also like the song “Last name” by Carrie Underwood. Because even though I didn’t get married in Vegas (which was one of my goals ), I did kiss a boy and I don’t know his last name!

But it is just a song right?

You’ll never see me again

Today I get sworn in as an attorney in the great state of CA.  It will be exciting. As soon as I get my bar number in a few weeks, I will be set to go.

I thought I had my plans to move to CA worked out, but that was before the girl whose room I was going to sublet never emailed back or called like she said she would. So now I’m on the hunt (Craigslist) again and trying to see what’s down there.  People are crazy.

Oh and Jenner called Saturday. I missed his first call so I called him back and left a message. He called back at 5pm.  He wanted to know if I was going out that night. Just like I figured why he was calling me. Then when I said no, he said quickly that he only meant dinner as he had a tennis tournament the next day and didn’t want to go out out anyways. Again, I said no to dinner. I think he was surprised that I turned him down because he brought it up several times over the course of our conversation. Which was of course all about him and his troubles. I’m SOOO over him. Gah, why did I ever like him? I’m just so relieved it never worked out. He’s so icky. And a loser! Like one of my favorite songs goes, Jenner, you’ll never see me again!

Oh and it’s raining again. And is freezing. So not June. It’s more like March.

I’d rather be alone, thanks

So my friend J has decided to get back with her boyfriend who dumped her almost two weeks ago.
Apparently he has had a change of heart.  Apparently he realized he was having a mid-life crisis. I think that’s only because all of his friends and family have told him how stupid he is for breaking up with her. Let’s recount. He’s 35, is a coke addict,  has a dead end job, and is in a dead end band. Not a winner. For the last two weeks, she’s been telling me that she’s ok with this, that she could see he’s not ready for a marriage and family, that his life-style is draining, not to mention illegal, that he’s emotionally unavailable, etc, etc. And now, since he’s decided he made a mistake, she gets back together with him. I just want to yell at her, but I won’t. I may tell her calmly that I feel that she’s acting emotionally rather than rationally. Also, she has decided to cancel all her social plans that she made to fill the void he left because “they want to spend time together.” BS.

Also, I spoke with our mutual friend G and J told her the opposite of what she told me. That they were working through things, but separately. That she wasn’t ready to get back with him. So why is she lying? She is just dumb. And she changed her myspace status back to “in a relationship”, and she lives by myspace, so I’m sure that this is it.

ARGH!

Oh and my stupid little cousin decided to get back with her “ass-wipe, inconsiderate, immature, selfish” (her words, not mine) boyfriend. Why?

I’d rather be alone, thanks.

No, he is not my boyfriend

Last night I went out with my friend from college, S. We were supposed to just be going out for a drink or two, but ended up staying out all night. I rolled into bed at 2 and am still tired (9 hours later). I wore the wrong shos so I have blisters :(  But I didn’t expect that’d we be bar-hopping, so it’s not really my fault.

It was fun to catch up with him. He’s a funny guy and really nice. As I texted to my friend E (also from college and friends with S), why can’t I like him like that? She responded in the same way. See, S is one of the last good guys.  He has a good job, nice car, super nice, has good morals, dresses nice, etc. And he is cute, I guess. But to me he is geeky S from college. I just can’t view him as anything but a fun friend to hang out with. There is no spark there. It was fun to hang out with him in that setting though. I suppose we could force liking each other, but where is the fun in that?

We ended up at this bar where I spotted a cute guy. S’s roommate, B (who was slightly obnoxious but is also 6 years younger than me so I guess that’s to be expected) tried to hook us up, but I said not to. I finally approached the cute guy, after about 45 minutes of watching him, and he wasn’t very nice.  Which was fine, because it’s not like I expected it to go anywhere. And by approaching him, I mean asking him the time. What, I wasn’t drunk and barely buzzed. Later the cute guy’s friend approached me and was visibly intoxicated. But he kept exclaiming that I was too cute not to have a boyfriend and asked me about four times if S was my boyfriend. It’s always nice to be flattered by drunk boys at the bar I guess.

Social experiment?

Last night I went out with Glasses (the girl Jenner and I worked with) for a couple drinks. It wasn’t actually bad. I was a little worried she’d talk a lot about Jenner, but she didn’t. It was a very, very weird night. Makes my Friday night look completely normal.

We were at the second bar of the night when we met the first odd boy. He kept asking us questions, but when we asked him questions back, he wouldn’t answer, and instead asked more questions. Pretty soon we were fed up and Glasses blurted out that she was done talking to him. So we wandered away where moments later we were approached by another boy. He wanted to know our ages as he was figuring out the demographics of the people who visited the bar. He was very drunk and kept asking us our names and occupations. Pretty soon we just started lying, because after the fourth time, it was really obnoxious. He was pretty odd but soon wandered away in quest of other girls to bug. Then the really weird guys appeared. This guy wearing a pimp hat (no joke) approached us and asked us for our female opinion. He seemed legit if not a bit funny, so we answered his question Then he started assessing our body language. Next his three friends appeared and he introduced as the socially awkward girls. WTF? Who does that? If anyone is socially awkward, it was him. One of his friends started quizzing us on Kierkegaard’s theory that we are all pretending and lying to one another. Again, wtf? He finally left us alone and so did the pimp guy. But the other two friends remained and started criticizing everything about what we were saying to the way we were dressed and what we were drinking. Not to mention criticizing women in general. Apparently, all of the women at the bar were gold-digging tramps. And the majority were cougars who should be at home with their kids and husband. We could not believe it. It was so strange and rude. Then the first two guys that we met (before the pimp hat guy) appeared and they all were friends. Again, so strange. Now, not to sound like I have an ego here, but Glasses and I are far above these guys on the looks meter. Most of the guys were short, with the exception of pimp hat guy who was like 6′4, and one of them was at my eye level. It was like something out of the VH1 show, The Pickup Artist. All of these ugly, short, ass guys trying to hit on women. Anyways, Pimp Hat guy re-appeared and said that he was teaching a class on socializing last night and that they were running a social experiment. So it all made sense. Basically they were trying to insult us thinking that we’d like it and hook up with them. Little did they know that we basically hated them. So we decided to leave because it was such a weird night…

Cut to the next bar. As we walk in, guess who we see? The same weird guys. Who immediately approach us and their other friend starts to ask our “female opinion”, but we ignored them. Which led to us being called idiots and some other rude comments. Finally, they left us alone. A little while later, we were standing around talking when these two guys approached us. They were pretty funny and nice. One was extremely touchy-feely so that was just weird. The other guy was a Seth Rogan lookalike and really funny. They seemed like cool guys and we were having fun. As the night progressed however, they wanted to leave and go dancing. We were both driving and it was getting late so we politely declined. To which they told us that we were a waste of their time and then left. Which was fine because we were a little irritated by that point. They were pretty drunk, kept touching us, and asking us the same questions over and over. And also dropping information that they were “loaded.” I don’t get how guys think sometimes. This is not impressive, does not make me like you, and is actually quite pathetic.

Finally we decided to leave. We hit up one more bar just to end the night on a positive note, but neither of us were drinking and it was small and crowded, so we left. However, it was a nice touch that the bouncer told us he only let certain people in and we made the cut.

It was such an odd night. From being criticized to yelled at to groped. Glasses says she attracts the weirdos, and I think she’s right. That being said, it was really fun hanging out with her. She wasn’t as annoying as Jenner thinks she is and she’s so blunt that it’s funny.

New beer

So last night I went out with my friend J (the one whose bf just broke up with her), and it was a tad crazy. We went to this out of the way fancy bar for our first drink. We met this weird guy who kept telling J how to know if she will die when she flies. Even though she’s scared to death of flying, he insisted on explaining the engineering of airplanes and flying.  Not a good technique if you actually are trying to flirt.  Next on our list was Kell’s, an Irish pub, but on our way there, we stumbled across an English pub. And it was freakin’ awesome. They only sell Samuel Smith beer (3 choices) and red or white wine. Nothing else. It was like being in an English gentleman’s living room or lounge for you Brits. Very cozy, eclectic, and cool. We met some random people from NYC who were super nice.  We stayed there for a beer (amazing by the way, Stella who?) and then headed to Kell’s.  Where we proceeded to be in the minority. There were approximately 90% men and 10% women there. Awesome.  We hung out with a bachelor party group. The groom-to-be was very sweet and really nice. But so young. Only 22! And his best man was cute, but only turned 22 today. They made him dress in leather pants and a ripped, sleeveless jean shirt. Pretty funny.  After they left, we got hit on by these two 20-year old guys. Who thought we were 22. That’s about a decade off for my friend J, and 6 years off for me. So that was awesome. We both look very young, so that’s not totally unusual, but it was nice. Especially after our problems with men this week. They tried to get us to go back to their house, that has a hot tub! (not a selling point in my book), and while J was fully on board, I insisted on us getting a cab back to her apartment. Good choice as we were both a lot more drunk than I realized.

All in all, it was a good night, and most of all, I loved Samuel Smith. Tell me it’s on the approved list Dom/Perpetual

Oh, and p.s., Jenner just called. I didn’t answer.

So weak

I am so weak. I cannot give up on him. I think I talked to too many people today and now have all sorts of thoughts running through my mind. This sucks. I need distractions!

Protected: Three strikes…

This post is password protected. To view it please enter your password below:

Password: